Welcome to B-School

Happy Monday Coffee Readers,

what_is_bschoolI just signed up for Marie Forleo’s B-School and I absolutely could not be any more excited. I got a little newsletter in my email from Mastin Kipp of “The Daily Love” promoting B-School and how he would not be where he is without it. Being that I have witnessed TDL explode over the last couple years, I totally trust his path and recommendations. I had heard him mention it before a while back but for some reason now it’s been calling my name.

One of the things that struck me when I was watching one of her videos was that Marie described herself as a “multi-passionate entrepeneur”. She was explaining how she has been interested in many different things over the years and had pursued so many different dreams and I totally related. The reason is hit me so hard was because I always felt a sort of shame for that quality in myself. I would be mad that I just couldn’t pick a certain area to completely focus on. I did not think it was normal to be really passionate about so many different things. I went to school for Psychology and since then looked into going back to school for graphic design. Started my freelance photography. Was having meetings to start making an app. Wanted to start doing mentoring through TDL. Made custom coasters as gifts one year and wanted to start selling those. I used to want to be a teacher. A financial advisor. Have had jobs in accounting and now business management. Along with millions and millions of plans and ideas.

I’m the girl who always has some new adventure she wants to begin. The thing is, I REALLY am passionate about them all and want to do it all. But like I said, I had some shame in that as if I was SUPPOSED to just be more passionate about something specific. I felt like I was always going to feel lost if I didn’t pick one thing and I’d never be successful. Of course I cared a lot what people close to me thought. “Here she is again, excited about SOMETHING ELSE”.

After hearing her use that term I immediately felt some relief. Here is this woman who felt just like I did yet she IS successful and proud of her many passions. So I decided that YES I am multi-passionate and I’m gonna own it!

Over the last almost year, I have decided that my main dream is just to grow and learn and be happy doing whatever I am doing while inspiring and helping others do the same whether it be through some sort of mentoring or life coaching, or just expressing myself through this blog. I feel that there are just waaaay too many people out there are working for the sake of money and not following their dreams and doing what makes them HAPPY. I truly believe when you take risks and trust in yourself and your purpose that money will be attracted to you and become a plus not the goal. Its my calling to make a dent in that area and it first sells by being the example.

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I still want to do photography. I still want to sell cool coasters. I still VERY much want to do the app. and I will probably come up with a ton of more ideas and passions after that. The thing I realized is that I DONT have to pick one thing and I CAN do it all.

B-School excites me because not only have i read nothing but WONDERFUL reviews for it but I know that the tools I will learn and apply to my current passions will further help me with all the future endeavors I want to be a part of.

Usually I have really bad buyer’s remorse, almost instantly. I bought my car and wanted to take it back the next day. Last year I bought a timeshare and actually returned it a week later. I just had buyers remorse in Bali after buying a dress and a t-shirt. 🙂 B-School is a bit expensive for me but I felt such a strong pull towards it that I knew I just had to go for it. Otherwise I’m sure I would have had remorse over NOT buying it. I feel not one single bit of remorse and am counting down the days till next monday.

I am eager to learn more and expand what I am already doing so why not make this investment for myself. I saw it as an investment for my dreams. There’s no better investment than that. Sometimes you just have to jump and only look forward and I’m very proud of myself for doing that. The only thing I felt was a roadblock was the money, which I’m sure for most people it is. The magical thing was, on Friday I was thinking about taxes and it hit me, I usually get around the same amount of money back in taxes as the school costs so that could cover the investment. Voila! See the Law of Attraction is always working and this time it came as a simple reminder.

I’m excited for you guys to now witness the effects of B-School and how it will work for me. Registration closes today at 3pm EST and they don’t think it’ll be open again until 2014 so if you have time to check it out and make the investment do so ASAP otherwise sit back and enjoy the show and by this time next year, we will see where I’m at.

xoxo,

May Cause Miracles: Week 1 Part 2

So it’s Tuesday and I’m starting Day 8. Yay, I made it through week 1. Usually Day 8 would have started yesterday but I was so out of it I could barely concentrate all day. I got home from Bali and was still trying to catch up time wise. I want to be able to put my energy into becoming aware and causing miracles so I gave myself a break.

Summary of the end of last week. I loved it. I love this book. Crazy enough I loved witnessing my fears. To me the opposite to Love is Fear so if I want to start living out of Love, I first have to learn how to get Fear to move its big booty over. I can not do that if I don’t take the time to recognize how fear is working in my life and I think the subtle steps in week 1 did a great job at helping do that.

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Day 4 was particularly my favorite because it was about Gratitude. “Gratitude is my only attitude for today“. Being grateful for the experiences I go through, the things around me, what I have, and even my fears have freed a whirlwind of paralyzing emotions. As human, we often tend to place focus on our lack of, which can cause fear and anxiety. When we shift and start to focus on what we have and become grateful for that, we let go of the fear and anxiety and welcome the abundances of the universe.

Day 4 Gratitude List:
1. Being able to experience this book
2. Waking up in magical Bali
3. The sounds of nature as I wake up in the morning
4. The black butterflies I keep seeing everywhere
5. My thoughtful fiance
6. Skype and being able to talk and see my son while I’m away
7. Being able to take a vacation
8. My blog – readers and followers
9. The pictures I have taken of this beautiful city
10. The opportunity to create peace through meditation.

and the list could go on an on. On Tuesday and Wednesday we actually were in a seminar about the Law of Attraction and each day we had to fill out a gratitude sheet with 50 things we are grateful for. It was amusing how on the second day things started coming to mind more quickly and any and everything was on the lists. That’s the glory of it. The more often you practice being grateful, the easier it gets and the more you become grateful for. You then move through the day LOVING your life.

The part of Day 4 that made me really enjoy it was figuring out how to be grateful for my fears. I had to go back to Day 1 and read some of my fears and write ways in which I am grateful for them.

“I fear that I’m not there enough or won’t be there for my son”
– I am grateful for this fear because it has made me more attentive to the NOW. I have become aware of the time I have and how  I will choose to spend time with my son, love him, play with him, laugh with him.

I fear that I won’t live the life that I dream”
– I am grateful for this fear because I know that if I want to live the life I dream I have to start taking the steps towards that life. I will start to focus more on my goals and acting appropriately in able to get closer.

Our fears can guide us towards being a victim or can guide us through seeking opportunity. Through opportunity we can GROW and LEARN.

Day 5 was all about the F-word…. FORGIVE. This is a day I know I will be continuously working on. If you do not know any better, it can be really hard to forgive. It is vital for our well-being though. It means you are choosing to move forward in your life. When you hold onto things it keeps you bound to that moment and can block all kinds of love from entering your heart. Most people think that forgiving means that they are excusing a behavior, but in fact it just means you have found your peace with it and won’t allow it to continue to lead your life. The most important person to forgive is yourself. “I forgive myself for choosing fear. Today I will choose love instead”.

Its time to let myself off the hook. It ‘s time to realize that before I didn’t know any better but to allow fear rule my world. Now I am learning and it’s OK. All the choices of my past. It’s OK. Such a relief to know ITS OK. The evening exercise for this day was to replace my fearful thoughts with the knowledge that fear does me no good.

I fear that I am not good enough” – THIS FEAR IS NOT SERVING ME. I FORGIVE THIS FEAR AND CHOOSE LOVE INSTEAD.

On Day 6 the affirmation of the day was “I believe in Miracles”. This day is about using the experiences I’ve had throughout the week into actively witnessing miracles take place. A miracle is a moment in which you choose love over fear. After working 5 days witnessing my fears and opening up to loving ideas, it’s time to notice how it can work for me. I can say that I have definitely witnessed some miracles on the way. On this day particular, one I remember is when we went to the Bali Zoo and decided to do a treetop adventure. I am afraid of heights but for some reason I wanted to experience this adventure. It had to do with all kinds of obstacles that were very high up in the trees. Zip lining, climbing up and down ropes, walking on crazy brides, on tightrope etc. Lets just say fear jumped all over this opportunity. I found myself very scared in many situations throughout this adventure but also found myself choosing love instead. THAT’S A MIRACLE! I chose to push my fears aside (I’ll admit sometimes I had to be pushed off the ledge….literally), breath, and welcome in a loving thought. The best past was that it seemed automatic. Miracles DO happen!

The week ended with Day 7 allowing me to reflect on the weeks work. It’s awesome to have a day where I can just reflect on what has happened to me and the shifts that have taken place. I even took an extra day to do so.

I am so excited for week 2 to begin. SELF LOVE week. A week I truly truly need.

catch up with you soon.

xoxo,

barista

Commencement Speech: The Earth Is Hiring

While we were taking a break at the Yoga Barn in Ubud, on the table sat this laminated copy of the commencement speech that was given in 2009 at the University of Portland by Paul Hawkin. I wanted to copy it here for all of you to read. It is amazing!

THE EARTH IS HIRING

“When I was invited to give this speech, I was asked if I could give a simple short talk that was “direct, naked, taut, honest, passionate, lean, shivering, startling, and graceful.” No pressure there.

Let’s begin with the startling part. Class of 2009: you are going to have to figure out what it means to be a human being on earth at a time when every living system is declining, and the rate of decline is accelerating. Kind of a mind-boggling situation… but not one peer-reviewed paper published in the last thirty years can refute that statement. Basically, civilization needs a new operating system, you are the programmers, and we need it within a few decades.

“Working for the earth is not a way to get rich, it is a way to be rich.”

This planet came with a set of instructions, but we seem to have misplaced them. Important rules like don’t poison the water, soil, or air, don’t let the earth get overcrowded, and don’t touch the thermostat have been broken. Buckminster Fuller said that spaceship earth was so ingeniously designed that no one has a clue that we are on one, flying through the universe at a million miles per hour, with no need for seatbelts, lots of room in coach, and really good food—but all that is changing.

There is invisible writing on the back of the diploma you will receive, and in case you didn’t bring lemon juice to decode it, I can tell you what it says: You are Brilliant, and the Earth is Hiring. The earth couldn’t afford to send recruiters or limos to your school. It sent you rain, sunsets, ripe cherries, night blooming jasmine, and that unbelievably cute person you are dating. Take the hint. And here’s the deal: Forget that this task of planet-saving is not possible in the time required. Don’t be put off by people who know what is not possible. Do what needs to be done, and check to see if it was impossible only after you are done.

When asked if I am pessimistic or optimistic about the future, my answer is always the same: If you look at the science about what is happening on earth and aren’t pessimistic, you don’t understand the data. But if you meet the people who are working to restore this earth and the lives of the poor, and you aren’t optimistic, you haven’t got a pulse. What I see everywhere in the world are ordinary people willing to confront despair, power, and incalculable odds in order to restore some semblance of grace, justice, and beauty to this world. The poet Adrienne Rich wrote, “So much has been destroyed I have cast my lot with those who, age after age, perversely, with no extraordinary power, reconstitute the world.” There could be no better description. Humanity is coalescing. It is reconstituting the world, and the action is taking place in schoolrooms, farms, jungles, villages, campuses, companies, refuge camps, deserts, fisheries, and slums.

You join a multitude of caring people. No one knows how many groups and organizations are working on the most salient issues of our day: climate change, poverty, deforestation, peace, water, hunger, conservation, human rights, and more. This is the largest movement the world has ever seen. Rather than control, it seeks connection. Rather than dominance, it strives to disperse concentrations of power. Like Mercy Corps, it works behind the scenes and gets the job done. Large as it is, no one knows the true size of this movement. It provides hope, support, and meaning to billions of people in the world. Its clout resides in idea, not in force. It is made up of teachers, children, peasants, businesspeople, rappers, organic farmers, nuns, artists, government workers, fisherfolk, engineers, students, incorrigible writers, weeping Muslims, concerned mothers, poets, doctors without borders, grieving Christians, street musicians, the President of the United States of America, and as the writer David James Duncan would say, the Creator, the One who loves us all in such a huge way.

“Humanity is coalescing. It is reconstituting the world, and the action is taking place in schoolrooms, farms, jungles, villages, campuses, companies, refuge camps, deserts, fisheries, and slums.”

There is a rabbinical teaching that says if the world is ending and the Messiah arrives, first plant a tree, and then see if the story is true. Inspiration is not garnered from the litanies of what may befall us; it resides in humanity’s willingness to restore, redress, reform, rebuild, recover, reimagine, and reconsider. “One day you finally knew what you had to do, and began, though the voices around you kept shouting their bad advice,” is Mary Oliver’s description of moving away from the profane toward a deep sense of connectedness to the living world.

Millions of people are working on behalf of strangers, even if the evening news is usually about the death of strangers. This kindness of strangers has religious, even mythic origins, and very specific eighteenth-century roots. Abolitionists were the first people to create a national and global movement to defend the rights of those they did not know. Until that time, no group had filed a grievance except on behalf of itself. The founders of this movement were largely unknown — Granville Sharp, Thomas Clarkson, Josiah Wedgwood — and their goal was ridiculous on the face of it: at that time three out of four people in the world were enslaved. Enslaving each other was what human beings had done for ages. And the abolitionist movement was greeted with incredulity. Conservative spokesmen ridiculed the abolitionists as liberals, progressives, do-gooders, meddlers, and activists. They were told they would ruin the economy and drive England into poverty. But for the first time in history a group of people organized themselves to help people they would never know, from whom they would never receive direct or indirect benefit. And today tens of millions of people do this every day. It is called the world of non-profits, civil society, schools, social entrepreneurship, non-governmental organizations, and companies who place social and environmental justice at the top of their strategic goals. The scope and scale of this effort is unparalleled in history.

The living world is not “out there” somewhere, but in your heart. What do we know about life? In the words of biologist Janine Benyus, life creates the conditions that are conducive to life. I can think of no better motto for a future economy. We have tens of thousands of abandoned homes without people and tens of thousands of abandoned people without homes. We have failed bankers advising failed regulators on how to save failed assets. We are the only species on the planet without full employment. Brilliant. We have an economy that tells us that it is cheaper to destroy earth in real time rather than renew, restore, and sustain it. You can print money to bail out a bank but you can’t print life to bail out a planet. At present we are stealing the future, selling it in the present, and calling it gross domestic product. We can just as easily have an economy that is based on healing the future instead of stealing it. We can either create assets for the future or take the assets of the future. One is called restoration and the other exploitation. And whenever we exploit the earth we exploit people and cause untold suffering. Working for the earth is not a way to get rich, it is a way to be rich.

The first living cell came into being nearly 40 million centuries ago, and its direct descendants are in all of our bloodstreams. Literally you are breathing molecules this very second that were inhaled by Moses, Mother Teresa, and Bono. We are vastly interconnected. Our fates are inseparable. We are here because the dream of every cell is to become two cells. And dreams come true. In each of you are one quadrillion cells, 90 percent of which are not human cells. Your body is a community, and without those other microorganisms you would perish in hours. Each human cell has 400 billion molecules conducting millions of processes between trillions of atoms. The total cellular activity in one human body is staggering: one septillion actions at any one moment, a one with twenty-four zeros after it. In a millisecond, our body has undergone ten times more processes than there are stars in the universe, which is exactly what Charles Darwin foretold when he said science would discover that each living creature was a “little universe, formed of a host of self-propagating organisms, inconceivably minute and as numerous as the stars of heaven.”

So I have two questions for you all: First, can you feel your body? Stop for a moment. Feel your body. One septillion activities going on simultaneously, and your body does this so well you are free to ignore it, and wonder instead when this speech will end. You can feel it. It is called life. This is who you are. Second question: who is in charge of your body? Who is managing those molecules? Hopefully not a political party. Life is creating the conditions that are conducive to life inside you, just as in all of nature. Our innate nature is to create the conditions that are conducive to life. What I want you to imagine is that collectively humanity is evincing a deep innate wisdom in coming together to heal the wounds and insults of the past.

Ralph Waldo Emerson once asked what we would do if the stars only came out once every thousand years. No one would sleep that night, of course. The world would create new religions overnight. We would be ecstatic, delirious, made rapturous by the glory of God. Instead, the stars come out every night and we watch television.

This extraordinary time when we are globally aware of each other and the multiple dangers that threaten civilization has never happened, not in a thousand years, not in ten thousand years. Each of us is as complex and beautiful as all the stars in the universe. We have done great things and we have gone way off course in terms of honoring creation. You are graduating to the most amazing, stupefying challenge ever bequeathed to any generation. The generations before you failed. They didn’t stay up all night. They got distracted and lost sight of the fact that life is a miracle every moment of your existence. Nature beckons you to be on her side. You couldn’t ask for a better boss. The most unrealistic person in the world is the cynic, not the dreamer. Hope only makes sense when it doesn’t make sense to be hopeful. This is your century. Take it and run as if your life depends on it.”

Reflect on the Journey

It’s the last day of the year!!! Some never thought we’d make it to see this day but we’re here at the end of chapter on another year with promise and hope for many more to come.

hindsight-rear-view-future-past-road-mirrorI like for everyone to take some time today and REALLY reflect on this past year and what has happened.

As I look back on 2012, I remember the feeling I had last January and knowing that 2012 was going to be a BEGINNING to awesome things and boy have I manifested that. I started this blog which is a huge step in the direction I want to go. I went to New York for the first time and with my mother of which we hadn’t been on a vacation together for a loooong time. I tried some things I’d never done before like zip lining and parasailing. Both also taking me out of my comfort zone due to my fear of heights. I got engaged to my love and the father of my child of whom I’ve been involved with for the last 7 years. I experienced freedom by setting some truths free and the outcome forced me to grow. We moved into a new house of which we absolutely love, in the process let go of some old and welcomed some new. I’ve been able to spend some amazing quality time with my family. We’ve decided that we want another baby. I created a model of an app idea I’ve been sitting on for two years, and met with some people to see what it’s going to take to make it. I got to meet and have a short conversation with a huge inspirator of mine, Mastin Kipp. I’ve learned more about living a healthy lifestyle. I’ve witnessed new beginnings for my loved ones around me be it babies, marriages, new boyfriends, new schools, new houses, new jobs, new perspectives. I’ve felt love, loss, anxiety, calm, peace, pain, happiness, joy, and a multitude of other emotions! I EMBRACE IT ALL. I am now equipped with knowing even more of what I want to create for myself and my future.

Sometime today, preferably before things get too wild, try to sit down in a quiet space and just go over all the events that took place this last 12 months. Were there things you did for the first time? Did you do something you’ve always wanted to do? Did you step out of your comfort zone? If so, what was the outcome? Did something terrible happen to you at all? What were the lessons learned? How have you become better? Can you see, even a little, how it fits the bigger picture? What were your moments of joy? Did you do anything to step closer to your dreams?

Years come and go and some of us never fully take the time to reflect on our journey. It is fufilling to take a rest break, look back at all the places you’ve been, painful, joyful, loving, or hard and just fully welcome who you are today because of everything. To let go for a second all the woulda coulda shouldas, the whatifs and maybes, and embrace ALL your experiences.

Tomorrow we can focus on our blank canvas of the new year. Today let’s be thankful for our journeys thus far!

xoxo,
barista

12/21/12 : The Threshold to a New Beginning.

well well well, today is December 21, 2012. The apocalypse every one has waited for. I assume if you are reading this, we are still alive or you are the one of few that survived. Or maybe this is the year 3026 and someone found my computer under dirt. Just messing.

Anyways… so everyone thought the world is going to end today. But guess what? we’re still here as I’m sure you can tell. The Mayan calendar couldn’t go on to infinity ya know. And of course there’s those patterns of all the ages…prehistoric, dark, ice, etc that all end in some catastrophe. Well guess what, I believe this all to be true.

I wrote a note on Facebook a while back talking about how maybe the world IS going to end. Since you are still reading this, maybe your perspective on what END means has to change and in that is the foreshadow to what lies ahead. A massive shift in perception. One meaning of the word END means “the last part or extremity”. Instead of a physical end or the end to humanity, maybe this is just the end to an era we have lived in. I think we are leaving an era of sleep and awakening to the dawn of a new day.

We awaken to see the potential of the new era awaiting our arrival. December 2012 is thought to be the closing of a chapter and now we are shifting into the power of consciousness.

Some people who believe in astrology believe that the dates 12/12/12 and 12/21/12 are closely related. That 12/12/12 is the opening of a gateway with 12/21/12 being the final walk-through. Supposedly we should have been aware of what was happening with us on 12/12/12 as it if a foreshadow of where you are headed as you cross the threshold. Dang, wish I knew this ahead of time! There are now new possibilities seeded within and from this day forward you will never be the same. Anyone experience a big change or something interesting happen between these dates? I would love to hear about it if so!

Welcome to the era of Enlightenment. Remember to wear your sunglasses.
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The “Golden Age” has begun. Our awareness is being expanded as you read. We are now entering a world in which we will come closer to our true being. We start to connect with our high source and understand our purpose here. It is said that throughout this transformation, eventually, everything negative will be forgotten about and instead the new world will be filled with love, peace, and happiness. We probably wont live to see this perfect world, and our children may never either, but as our lineage extends on and on they will come closer and closer to this time. Isn’t it amazing to think that it all starts with US.

When we are born, we are born with the energy of Love. It is as natural as the breath we take. But over time we learned to love ourselves less and less. Some even eventually were led to believe love is dangerous. Well that is coming to an end. We are coming to experience that love is NOT dangerous. We are burning all we “thought” to be true and welcoming all we KNOW to be true. Love is the ANSWER not the problem. It starts with the love for ourselves.

We are alive today during this time period for a reason. We are the beginning of a new chapter. The fifth dimension. I don’t know about you but this is awesome. There is a lot of power in our hands now. The threshold is here and LOVE is the password. We will re-learn to love ourselves. And through that, teach and inspire our children who will then continue to pass the great gift. And although we may not be around to witness the human race collectively living in a world of peace, love, and happiness, we can make sure that we INDIVIDUALLY can witness peace, love, and happiness before our end. The world IS our perception anyways right?

I mean havent you noticed more and more people becoming attracted to some sort of consciousness. How many positive quotes do you see/read daily? How many blogs have you come across? How many conversations have you had? More people interested in changing the world. More people interested in yoga and meditating. More people becoming more spiritual and less religious. It seems like more and more people are going through a process of discovering their purpose. It’s more than just a fad.

Going back to the pure heart we once knew is probably one of the hardest things to do because through that journey we must go through a great deal. In order for lessons to be learned we must suffer. Be ready… all your shit is about to come up! But don’t worry because you will pass through these times, you will learn the lessons faster and faster, and in the end you will become a greater being for the sake of humanity.

I ask you, from this point forward, pay attention! notice the shifts happening around you. Pay attention to what comes up for you in your life. What you can learn. Pay attention to this things brought you way and the love you attract. Pay attention to the conversations you see or have. Pay attention to the shifts you go through. Lastly, Pay attention to your intuition! As that is your higher self speaking to you. LISTEN!!! Because after today, your world as you know it will never be the same.

xoxo,

barista

The Daily Love: Paradox of Uncertainty

Had to re-post an article by Jacob Sokol wrote on The Daily Love yesterday. Being that I am 28 (almost 29, yikes) I am definitely at that point in life of really trying to figure out, What do I want to do? What is my purpose? and I felt like this article was a great motivator.

I know many friends, and im sure some of you, that are in this same boat. The most scary thing about trying to figure these answers out, especially at this age, is not knowing what lies ahead of you and being unable to see how you will “safely” get there.

Well the key word is “safe”. Something to ask yourself is, what has “safe” done for you so far? Most likely safe has gotten you to the place where you are now… anxious and uncertain.

Check out what Jacob has to say about this Paradox of Uncertainty (via The Daily Love).

jacob You ever feel a pressure to pick the *perfect* path in your life?

Technically the options are endless but it feels like there’s nowhere to start. How do you know what’s realistic and what’s a straight-up pipe-dream? You wanna make an impact, you wanna stack cake, and you wanna be emotionally rewarded. But what exactly do you need to do, and how exactly do you get started?

I know I’m not the only one who’s been paralyzed by this predicament. It can feel emotionally, mentally and spiritually exhausting – like we’re tirelessly treading water, waiting for the right job, mentor, or situation to suddenly appear. SPLASH!

As a generation, there’s this invisible yet immense weight on us to identify e-x-a-c-t-l-y what we wanna do with our lives and then spell it out in a 5-point-plan for achieving our 10-year-goals.

The seed for this mysterious pressure was planted way back when we ate spaghetti with our hands and wiped our faces with our shirts. The authority figz (mom, dad, and teach) asked us what we wanted to be when we grow up: A doctor, a lawyer, or a teacher perhaps? If you were me, you said a garbage truck, and were serious.

Picture it… we had the knowledge base of 7-year-old’s. We barely knew our alphabet and we probably couldn’t control our farts yet. You think we’re capable of accurately analyzing the emotional, social, and financial sacrifices required to pass our GREs or get into med-school? Compound that contorted notion with the reality that most professions which existed thirty years ago are now becoming obsolete endangered species (a shout out to the evolution of technology and the globalization of the economy).

Asking us the seemingly innocent question, “What do YOU wanna be when you grow up?” implies that we SHOULD know what we wanna do (or “be”). If you’re lucky you’ll hear, “You’ve got PLENTY of time to figure it out,” subconsciously continuing to stress the imperative significance of this passive-aggressive suggestion.

So is it really any surprise that by the time we reach our mid-20s we’re already going through a quarter life-crisis? Pop-culture paints the 20′s as the most glamorous years of our life, which just makes it even MORE frustrating for us, since we feel like “Why-the-f don’t I have ‘IT’ figured out already? What’s wrong with me?!”

And since we feel like picking the perfect path in our 20s will dictate our 30s, 40s, 50s – our entire life (!!!) – it’s no wonder why we’re paralyzed by possibilities.

It’s a poetic paradox: On one hand, we have ALL the possibilities in the world. And on the other hand, all those possibilities leave us feeling anxious and uncertain.

A few hours ago, I got off the phone with a girl who I coach. She was uneasy, bothered by the plethora of potentialities for her future and (of course) didn’t quite understand which was the *perfect* path to pick. Baffled, she asked me for some guidance.

The Existential Rat Race

Taking a deep breath, I momentarily reflected three years back on my own path. At the time, I was 24-years-old and having an allergic reaction to my life.

You see, I used to work for an awesome IT company as a computer network consultant in Times Square NYC. I made a nice living enjoying all the cliché token things a “successful” 24-year-old would want: A sweet apartment, a fun car, a fast motorcycle, a fashionable wardrobe, and fancy dinners with friends.

So WHAT was missing?

Enthusiasm! Behind the scenes, I led a life of quiet desperation and all the new techy toys in the world wouldn’t prevent me from waking up and feeling like, “Damn, I gotta go through THIS routine again today!?”

Questions like, “Who am I?” and “What’s my purpose?” marinated heavily in my mind. It was an existential rat race.

Fast forward to today, three years later, and my hero’s journey has had some remarkable turns. I’m living my purpose, doing *EXACTLY* what I wanna do, and, I’m getting paid to do it!

But if you would have sat down with the 24-year-old Jacob and asked him to imagine doing what the 27-year-old Jacob is currently doing, it’d be unfathomable.

Why? Because it was nearly unimaginable and COMPLETELY unrealistic. I hadn’t “leveled-up” my sense of reality yet. In other words, my sense of what was REALLY possible with life hadn’t been proven to myself BY myself.

Sure, I read lots of inspiring books and watched loads of (illegally downloaded) personal growth seminars on how to become a better person (I love you, Irony). BUT, it was inspirational entertainment. 90% of the time I was *watching* and 10% of the time I was *doing*.

You see, I hadn’t actually taken that stuff which was so fascinating and implemented it into my life – day after day – thus, not yet believing – rather, not yet KNOWING – it could be my reality!

There were a sequence of subsequent realities I had to get to, one by one, month after month, in order to be where I am today. I needed to defy the odds, one step at a time, before I could imagine the incredible possibilities for my future. (So do you.)

Well, where am I currently? The short answer: Coaching peeps on how to find their purpose and increase their quality of life.

But how did I get there when two years ago I didn’t even know what a life coach was? I fully immersed myself IN myself. I invested in myself, spending 1000′s of hours consciously doing the work I needed to in order to figure out how I could enjoy an optimal life with a deep sense of purpose. I threw my life over the fence of my fears, into the yard of my dreams, and then had the sensible response of “now I need to go get that!”

I had doubts, fears, panic attacks, and suicide contemplations. (Yes, all in the last three years.) I faced gossip, criticism, ridicule, and opposition. My family told me I was an idiot and old-skool friends subtlety evaporated.

Was it easy? Hell no. Was it worth it? Hell yes!

Last Sunday I interviewed the man who taught the most popular class at Harvard of all time. Our conversation was about happiness. And for the last 10 months, I’ve been having similar conversations with other world-class thinkers as I create A Roadmap for Young Adults to navigate the current challenges we face today.

What’s ‘A Roadmap for Young Adults’ you ask? Well, I know you’ve heard of Mastin’s The Daily Love EXTRAVANGANZA (which was produced by en*theos). Well, I’ve been working with en*theos since February 2012 to create my own extravaganza addressing the current cultural challenges of being a Young Adult in today’s world.

The relationships which have sprouted from the conversations for this event have been soul-boggling! I’m interviewing my heroes!

I’ve also been Mastin’s Teacher Assistant on 4 out of the 5 classes he’s taught this year. I’ve got some incredible mentors and a flourishing coaching business that helps other peeps create extraordinary lives, too. The list goes on.

Three years ago, there was NO possible way you could have convinced me that this would be my reality. I didn’t even know who these people were. I didn’t even know what a blog was. A life WHAT- coach?!

Before any of this could be my reality, I needed to step into uncertainty, trust my gut, invest in myself, and allow myself to follow myself. I needed to figure out how to live on purpose. And I have.

The Paradox of Uncertainty

“Most people will choose unhappiness over uncertainty.” -Tim Ferriss

My advice to my client was straight forward: don’t worry about figuring it all out right now. But INVEST in YOURSELF. Do the work, the deep DEEP work of figuring out who you currently are and who you aspire to be in the future. Ask yourself the quality questions!

What would you do if you had unlimited time and money? What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail and everyone thought it was awesome? What qualities do you admire in others and how you can cultivate them in yourself?

And with a diligent work-ethic, and a L O O O O O O N G-term perspective in mind, focus on two main things.

  1. Service. How can you create massive goals of serving people (and trusting in the karmic process of reciprocity without the need for immediately getting gratifying results)?
  2. Your values. How can you *enjoy the process* of serving people – doing things that are in alignment with your values while cultivating and using your strengths to rock it?!

Success works in counter-intuitive ways.

The more we can serve others, the more we’ll be served. When we move toward our fears, they lose power over us. When we become vulnerable, we get stronger. And when we step into uncertainty, infinite possibilities present themselves!

For many of us, NOT attempting to predict our futures may be the better option. We can’t turn a corner until we arrive at it. And if we’ve never been down a road, it’s impossible to know what lies around its corner (sorry Google-maps, you don’t work here).

What we CAN do is find certainty in ourselves.

We can find certainty in knowing that when we rock our fundamental practices daily – our exercise, nutrition, meditation, gratitude, social relationships, creativity – we’ll be stepping into our higher-self.

We can find certainty in studying and cultivating our knowledge of self – our passions, strengths, ambitions, values, fears, triggers, purpose, and definition of success.

We can find certainty in dispelling our limiting beliefs by taking action in the face of fear.

We can find certainty in knowing there is a Uni-versal path – and when we show up PATIENTLY, PERSISTENTLY, PLAYFULLY, and DILIGENTLY, we are *bound* to be successful!

Don’t limit yourself to the perceived possibilities that currently exist in your life. Allow yourself the leeway to virtuously step into uncertainty so you can do what matters most to you, TRUSTING, that in the long run – “in the long run I say” – the best place you can play is in the paradox of uncertainty.

On purpose,

Jacob