Are You Staying True to Your Inner Moral Beliefs?

3542449_orig

“With the self as a focal point, you sustain the illusion that you are your body, which is a completely separate entity from all others. This sense of separateness leads you to compete rather then cooperate with everyone else” – Wayne Dyer

Being that it was Martin Luther King Jr. Day yesterday, I thought today was perfect day for this post. MLK represented a man you was very connected to his intention and Source. He consciously chose to act out of his loving instead of his ego, even through the hardest of times, which lead him to making great connection with many people on many levels.

I hear and read so many people, myself many times included, that have the intention of being and acting one way (kind, love thy neighbor, accepting, compassionate, empathetic) yet many times have a hard time staying connected to that intention and can end up acting in a way that can be quite the opposite (judgemental, mean, rejecting, jealous). I know sometimes I can feel so passionate about something I perceive as negative that I also respond in a negative manner. In reality, this is making me no different then the source that caused my reaction. As Dr. King has said “Darkness can not drive out darkness, only light can do that”. So how can we learn to stay connected to our inner most intentions and project light onto all situations?

Integrity

One of my goals for myself is to continue to discover and define my inner moral code and consciously, with intention, chose to live by that code during all situations. One of the things that gets in the way of that intention is my ego. We all have one and in respect we all NEED one. The ego can be very successful at helping us achieve the things we want in life with its goal minded orientation, but it can also harm us in many ways, especially when it comes to continuously acting out of our Authentic Self. The Self that wants to maintain our intentions and inner moral code.

In observance of Martin Luther King Jr. Day yesterday, I would like to quote a section from Wayne Dyer’s book, The Power of Intention, in his words. May we all strive to live a life of personal integrity and stay true to the person we have the intentions of being.

Seven Steps for Overcoming Ego’s Hold on You

1. Stop being offended. The behavior of others isn’t a reason to be immobilized. That which offends you only weakens you. If you’re looking for occasions to be offended, you’ll find them at every turn. This is your ego at work convincing you that the world shouldn’t be the way it is. You can’t reach the power of intention by being offended. By all means, act to eradicate the horrors of the world, which emanate from massive ego, but stay in peace. Being offended creates the same destructive energy that offended you in the first place and leads to attack, counterattack, and war.

2. Let go of your need to win. Ego loves to divide us up into winners and losers. The pursuit of winning is a surefire means to avoid conscious contact with intention. Why? Because ultimately, winning is impossible all of the time – Someone out there will always be faster, luckier, younger, stronger, and smarter – and back you’ll go to feeling worthless and insignificant. You are not your winnings or victories. There are no losers in a world where we all share the same energy source. Let go of your needing to win by not agreeing that the opposite of winning is losing. Be at peace, and match up with the energy of intention. And ironically, although you’ll hardly notice it, more of those victories will show up in your life as you pursue them less.

3. Let go of your need to be right. Ego is the source of a lot of conflict and dissension because it pushes you in the direction of making other people wrong. When you’re hostile, you’ve disconnected from the power of intention. Letting go of your need to be right in your discussions and your relationships is like saying to the ego, I’m not a slave to you. I want to embrace kindness and I reject your need to be right. In fact, I’m going to offer this person a chance to feel better by saying she is right, and thank her for pointing me in the direction of truth. When you let go of the need to be right, you’re able to strengthen your connection to the power of intention. Keep in mind, the ego is a determined combatant. I’ve seen people willing to die rather than let go of the need to be right.

4. Let go of your need to be superior. True nobility isn’t about being better than someone else. It’s about being better than you used to be. Stay focused on your growth, with a constant awareness that no one on this planet is any better than anyone else. We all emanate from the same creative life force. Let go of your need to feel superior by seeing an unfolding of God in everyone. When you project feelings of superiority, that’s what you get back, leading to resentments and ultimately hostile feelings.

5. Let go of your need to have more. The mantra of the ego is more. It’s never satisfied. No matter how much you achieve or acquire, you’re ego will insist that it isn’t enough. You’ll find yourself in a perpetual state of striving, and eliminate the possibility of ever arriving. Yet in reality, you’ve already arrived, and how you chose to use this present moment  of your life is your choice. Ironically, when you stop needing more, more of what you desire seems to arrive in your life. Since you’re detached from the need of it, you’ll find it easier to pass it along to others, because you realize how little you need in order to be satisfied or at peace.

6. Let go of identifying yourself on the basis of your achievements. This may be a difficult concept if you think you are your achievements. I can  hear your ego loudly protesting. Nevertheless stayed tuned to this idea. All emanates from Source! You’re not this body and its accomplishments. You are the observer. Notice it all; and be grateful for the abilities you’ve been given, the motivation to achieve, and the stuff you’ve accumulated. The less you need to take credit for your achievements and the more connected you stay to the faces of intention, the more you’re free to achieve, and the more will show up for you.

7. Let go of your reputation. Your reputation is not located in you. It resides in the minds of others. Therefore, you have no control over it at all. If you speak to 30 people, you have 30 reputations. Connecting to intention means listening to your heart and conducting yourself based on what your inner voice tells you is your purpose here. If you’re overly concerned with how you’re going to be perceived by everyone, then you’ve disconnected yourself from intention and allowed opinion of others to guide you. This is your ego at work. It’s an illusion that stands between you and the power of intention. Leave your reputation for others to debate, it has nothing to do with you.

When I think of Martin Luther King Jr. and the type of man I have learned he was, I conclude that he succeeded in these seven steps. He and others with the loving centered heart like his (Ghandi, Mother Teresa, Jesus, Buddha) are the epitome of what living with personal integrity and intention are about.

Overcoming the ego is what allows people to stand out and stay remembered in a good manner. They connect with the masses and they exert a light into the darkness of others. The lift you up and they stay true to that inner voice directing them in ALL circumstances.

Let us all see this and use it to become a better version of ourselves. To emanate the purpose of our existence. Don’t let the darkness take control. Spread love and light to the world! Live a life of intention!

Happy Tuesday

xoxo,

barista

Take Action Now!

Do you ever feel stuck sometimes thinking “I know what the right thing to do is, but how come I can’t just do it”?

I feel that way all the time. For the last couple of years, just through the journey of acknowledging my spiritual self, I have accumulated a lot of knowledge that I whole-heartedly believe in when it comes to growing and doing the things that will lead me to the life that I love. Yet for some reason, the hardest part is DOING what I think and know to be true. LIVING that life instead of just KNOWING it.

What do you think it is that holds us back from moving forward towards what we know in our hearts is the right way to go?

Often when we want results, we want results quickly. Living in the technological world as it is today, this urgency has only become stronger. So when it comes to making goals and obtaining them, we often think in terms of making drastic changes  in order to reach the ideal outcome in as little as time possible.

This way of thinking and working can be VERY effective and useful for some people in some ways but it’s not always the best method in other areas. Especially areas that are most difficult for us.  This innovative way of thinking can induce a lot of FEAR. Fear of the unknown, Fear of change, Fear we don’t have enough time, Fear of Rejection, Fear that we aren’t good enough, and/or Fear of how great things really can be for us. Next question, how do we conquer this fear?

runner-at-sunset

One of the things I love about what I’ve done in school is we have created “Ideal Scenes” for different areas in our lives. For example, I could pick my Health and Wellbeing and create the Ideal Scene for what it looks like for me to be in my own “perfect” health and wellbeing. This is created in present tense as if things are that way RIGHT NOW using “I AM” phrases.

“I AM waking up early with lots of energy, excited to start the day”
“I AM having an alkaline based drink every morning to coat my stomach with the nutrients it needs”
“I AM enjoying my clear radiant skin”
” I AM meditating in the mornings in the beauty of the outside peace”
“I AM enjoying my exercise routine daily”

and so on….

Then what we are doing with these ideal scenes are creating action steps towards fulfilling the spokes on our Ideal Scenes. No matter how big or small, the most important part is creating an action step we know we will absolutely follow through with. This can be the tricky part because I have learned that what seems “small” to me, may really be harder to commit to then I think. This is where getting real come into play.

For example, A few months ago, an action step I thought I could complete over the month was “going to the gym 5 times”. This seemed so easy because I used to go to the gym 5 times in one week, so 5 times in one month should be a piece of cake right? Well over that next month I went to the gym ONCE. The next month instead of changing my action step, I decided to keep it the same. “Ok this time no excuses” I told myself. “I will make sure I go 5 times”. I looked at the schedule for a class I wanted to take and easily realized that I would do it this time. Welp, the next month I didn’t even get to the gym at all. How do you think this made me feel? Yea, not so good about myself.

Ya see, we are only as good as our word is and our word is directly related to our self-confidence. The more do not follow through with what we say we are going to do, the more we lose trust in ourselves. Trusting yourself is HUGE when it comes to continuing on that journey towards your dreams. Without trust, we create fear.

This next month, I’ll admit I was a little afraid to make any commitments because I wasn’t so sure I could trust myself to follow through, even with something that seemed so easy. This distrust and low esteem drains a lot of energy when it comes to even thinking about my ideal scenes.

During my last class session, instead of picking actions that we thought we would follow through with, big or small, we created VERY small steps towards the spokes on our ideal scenes. Instead of saying I am going to go to the gym 5 times in a month, or even 1 time in a month, I was to think of the VERY next step that I would do. How about I just make myself a gym bag with clothes I would take to work out. Not committing to going to the gym but just putting together the bag and putting it in the car. Even less than that, I could maybe just make a list of classes I would like to try. Just a list.

Instead of committing to four green smoothies or juices a month, maybe I just commit to buying veggies and fruits. Or even less, just pick out and make a list of recipes I want to try, and the ingredients I would need….You get the idea. Start Small!

If my word is directly related to my confidence and self-trust level, then although small, imagine how these steps would easily boost my confidence level. The Universe/God/Highest Power supports us in receiving the things that are meant to be in our lives, but it doesn’t do ALL the work for us. We are CO-creators in our lives…so when we take action, other doors will open allowing us to make the choice in taking the next step.

From that small boost of making myself a gym bag, I would most likely be energized to want to go further. If my gym bag is already made and in the car, I actually might want to work out one day. I may not feel the need to commit to it just yet but of course anything more is always an option. If not yet, no sweat, but if so, that’s even greater for me.

By taking these small steps, we are not only building our confidence but we are actually eliminating the fear that would be associated with steps that are much bigger.

KNOWING what to do is awesome, it’s definitely a great start, but just KNOWING is not enough. In order to reach your goals and dreams, taking action is something you must do over and over again.   Sometimes is seems so easy to know what to do, it can be clear as day to know what others should do, but as you may know in certain areas of your life, KNOWING what to do and consistently DOING it are two different things.

Over the last few years, immersing myself in books, blogs, seminars, shows, I loved gaining all the knowledge I was learning. It all resonates so true to me. My thoughts were always “How can I learn more?” But over time, I started to realize that knowledge is not truly what I am seeking. What I am seeking is the gift of experience. Knowing how to make a great meal does nothing for me if I don’t make it. I can’t experience the process and the great taste of the outcome if I don’t take action. Knowledge is indeed powerful and very necessary for those who want to create change. Knowing what you want, what you don’t want. How to get what you want. How to become better… but knowledge by itself doesn’t create the experience you thrive for… Taking Action does!

What is it that you have had a hard time acting on in your life? Create your ideal scene of that area. Don’t forget to use present tense sentences to add more power and possibility to your scenes. Then TAKE ACTION. You decide how big or small you want to go. If you mess up or you can’t keep the commitment, it’s OK. Let go of any judgement. Judgement only holds you back. Allow yourself to figure out what steps you CAN take, even if they seem itsy bitsy.

It’s the ACTION that will get you to where you want to be, not just the KNOWLEDGE.

Let me know in the comments below your experience!

light and love

xoxo,

barista

Mini Goal Monday: Integrity

Soooo Good Morning Everyone….How did your Mini Goals go this week? How many excuses did you make, to yourself and to others? Did you start to notice others excuses? How did you handle it? I can tell you how my goals went. Well I just typed HORRIBLE but i decided to erase it because ya know although I did not follow through on them 100%,  I can not discount the effort I put in as well as the parts I tried to make up. We have to learn how to change our perspective sometimes and look at the glass half full to give ourselves the boost and motivation we need to continue on.

So let’s see, my goals last week were to work out on Monday, do Bikram on Tuesday, Work out on Wednesday and Friday, and wake up at 7am every morning. Well I can definitely say the waking up at 7am did not really work out at all 🙂 It hard when my bed is so comfy in the morning!!! 🙂 I did not work out on Monday but I made it up with a short workout video early Friday morning. I was planning on Bikram on Tuesday but last-minute chose not go but made that up with an hour walk on Saturday. Unless something important come  up I always go to the gym on Wednesdays. What makes Wednesday so important you ask? Well I have a class I go to at the gym every Wednesday night and I have gone for over a year now. And it’s a FREE class. Isn’t that interesting. I have it built into my schedule therefore I do not miss it. That is how we should treat most goals which is why when I state my mini goals I try to get specific to place them in my schedule. It is a lot more powerful and leaves less room for excuses. When you say something like ” I will go to the gym after work” or “I will go later today”, by not specifying an exact time, you are leaving wide open space for other things to come in and take over therefore giving you the excuse of why you can no longer go. I did not  lose 2lbs this week either because I chose to pig out on candy all week. I found out my scale has been off by 4 lbs too but lets not talk about it, that just means I now have to work even harder to reach my goal.

Anyways, this all brings me to the topic Integrity. This will be a “mini” version though as Integrity alone could be an entire post. Integrity is a combination of three things: words, beliefs, and actions. We say something, we then believe  it to be true, and we act so to make it true. So in short, Integrity = Your Word. It is following through with what you said simply because you said it. Ever heard the quote “Say what you mean and mean what you say”? Well that is about Integrity. Last week I told you all to start paying attention to your excuses and why you feel the need to give them versus just stating that you simply just did not follow through on something. Now lets look at the other side of this. How about now we pay attention to our integrity. What happens in times in which we fail in our integrity? It usually goes like this…we say something, we don’t believe it to be true therefore we do not act accordingly. Or we can even go as far as believing it to be true but choose still not act. This is why excuses come into play. We have to make ourselves feel better for not following through with our words. I mean who wants to admit they lack integrity?

Excuses or not though, when you fail to follow through, you are lacking, even if just a little, on your integrity. Our word is who we are and all we have and it is closely related to our self-esteem. Every time we choose to go back on our word we are lowering our self-esteem. Even if it seems unimportant. After so many times we start to lose trust in ourselves. Your word becomes your character. When you can’t trust yourself, how are others suppose to trust you?

SO this week the challenge is to take a look at your words, your beliefs, and your actions and see how they align. Take notice of where in your life you can lack integrity. If you are unsure you will be able to follow-up on something don’t say it until you are sure… But at the same time, notice the le-way you are leaving  yourself to possibly back out. When this comes up, simply make a decision. When you say you’re going to call your friend back…call them back. When you say you are going to attend the party…attend the party. When you say you are going to go to the gym…go the gym! If later you realize you do not want to do these things…do them anyway. Why? Because you said you were going to. If you start to notice that you are having to do a lot of things you don’t want to do…then stop saying you would do it in the first place. COMMIT TO YOUR WORD!!!

Mini goals this week: do work out video before work at 7am monday (already done btw), Tuesday, thursday, and friday. Go to the gym Monday at 7:45pm, Wednesday at 8:00pm, Friday at 3:30pm. I was going to say some stuff for Saturday and Sunday but I work both days so I don’t want to say I will if I am tired. But if I end up working out, it’s a plus!  I will wake up at 7am every morning (yes today I passed) and I will lose at LEAST 2lbs.

Bonus Challenge: Even if you prefer to be anonymous…LEAVE YOUR MINI GOALS IN THE COMMENTS SECTION BELOW!!! Make them REAL! This blog is helping not only make my goals real, but keeping me responsible for when I don’t uphold to them. Let me know your mini goals, and the following week let me know what you discovered by following through or not following through.

until next time,

xoxo