RIGHT NOW!

relax_your_mindI realized I want need to become more present in the moment. Seems so cliché and easy to say, yet is one of the hardest things to do. I spend way to much time worrying about the future, as most of us do. Thinking about…planning for…being scared of!!! The problem with that is that the future never ends up exactly how we envision it to be. Shit just doesn’t always go as planned. Think about it, when has something gone EXACTLY how planned? probably never, but stuff ALWAYS works out and life always moves on, doesn’t it.

We tend to stress so much over the “what ifs” but the key is KNOWING that even if things go worse than planned, those moments are just a tiny piece of a bigger picture for you.

Think about some of the things you stress over when thinking about the future. How much time is wasted stressing out? Time that you can never get back. Wouldn’t it be nice to know that things will work out just the way it needs to? Well the secret is, IT DOES! Things ALWAYS work out for the best even if now it doesn’t seem so. How many times have you looked back and realized that all the stress was unneccessary? Yet for some reason, we continue to act the same way again and again and again.

The lesson is to TRUST! Trust in the Universe! Trust in yourself! If you have faith in higher power, you need to have faith in yourself. They go hand in hand. Your level of trust in yourself is a mirror of the trust you have in something greater.

You should still have goals, ideas, and plans but you have to KNOW that no matter what your goals, plans, and ideas for the future are, you will get to where you need to be yet sometimes it’s not in the way you expected. You have to let go of the expectations to make room for something more grand to happen. Start thinking about all the things you want to change. Things you want to come to you. What kind of person do I want to be and what do I want for my life?

For your creations to become reality you have to take action which requires you to respond to today! The present. Think about, what can I do TODAY to move closer to what I want? How can I enjoy TODAY?

Think about RIGHT NOW. What you have in your life RIGHT NOW. Be thankful for RIGHT NOW. That’s gratitude at its highest form. Being thankful for where you are, who you are, and what you have RIGHT NOW!!

When you do that, all the worries and stress tend to go out the window. You can breathe in the air of the moment and experience life…. which is RIGHT NOW. The past doesn’t exist anymore and the future never comes. The ONLY thing we have is RIGHT NOW

Living in the past or the future, or in many cases both, does nothing but limit you from becoming the greatest you can be.When you are living from one of those places, you are actually missing right now. And if you are missing right now, you are missing life. If you are missing life, then whats the point?

Living in the present allows you to paint on a blank slate in every moment. You can create whatever you want. Whatever you dream. That’s the fun part. It shouldnt be stressful. Every moment is new. It’s not fun painting on a canvas that’s already used.  When you live in the present you begin to LIVE. You begin to be HAPPY. You don’t waste any more of your time being regretful or afraid. The stresses lessen because you KNOW that no matter what, your path and all the things that have happened or are going to happened are for your greater good so you can reach your highest potential. The faster you start to recognize that and see how it’s played in your life RIGHT NOW, the more time you have to live a HAPPY fulfilled life and make every moment count and THAT is the point! Look at how fast time flies… don’t you want to be able to feel new every day? every moment.

So I challenge you to practice living in the now. One easy way to do that is just showing gratitude. Being thankful for right now. Let go of any pain from the past and any expectations from the future and just witness the miracles in front of you. Even if just for a moment a day…stop, breathe, and enjoy RIGHT NOW!

xoxo,

barista

Believe In Your Dreams and They Can’t Help but Come True!

Soooo I finally met Mastin Kipp, my hero!  Although I havent made a vision board physically I definitely have one in my head and certain things have been implanted so thick that, especially after this one, that they are starting to happen or I KNOW they are going to happen one day. Meeting Mastin Kipp was one of them. Meeting Mastin AND sitting and having a real truth conversation is another. Oh and add on being a part of what he does and TDL to go even further up on the Bucket List. But I’ll take meeting him, being nervous out of my mind that my hands were shaking and I made no eye contact and didn’t ask what I wanted to ask and feeling lame, for what it is… Which is, my visions are coming closer and closer to happening.

The craziest part is thinking about how it came about in a way that I didn’t even realize at the time. I was reading TDL and saw the banner for the seminar, it didn’t cost much money, it was in West Hollywood, I just figured why not make this move towards what you want and go to this seminar. I wasn’t even really thinking about meeting and speaking to Mastin. Seeing him speak was enough for me.

On the way to drop my son off at the babysitter, my boyfriend and I BOTH realized we left our phones at home. Which is rare because we are kinda stuck to them. I realized I had no clue where I was going and was dying without the Navigation on my phone. As we were dropping my son off we asked my friend to look up the address and directions on her phone as we had 15 minutes to be there. Her phone wasnt working at first, then we got directions to the wrong place. Luckily I noticed it before we left because we had directions to Culver City. We then had to look up the correct address and directions and then the traffic said one hour. We left it was 6:50pm and the seminar started at 7:00pm. The traffic was horrible and as it turned 7:00pm all I could do was wince because now not only were we late but we were gonna be really late. While we were driving, there was times where I was feeling like “of course this has to happen to me when it’s something I have really looked forward to” and I felt myself getting really frustrated but also I was stopping myself and breathing and trying to relax and just know I was gonna hear what I needed to hear no matter what time I got there…and that gave me peace! Whats meant to be will be, right?

Being able to catch myself thinking out of control and gain some control back, even if just for a moment at a time, is something HUGE in my head. It’s the small steps like these we have to give ourselves credit for. These are the small steps that are going to lead us to the top of the mountain, and it starts with recognition and gratitude from ourselves first. We don’t change over night, this is ongoing work, but with each little step life gets better and better. Maybe not easy, especially at first, but indeed better.

And guess what, I walked in and Mastin was JUST introduced and I hadn’t missed his turn at all. I missed Gabrielle speak her story but maybe it wasn’t my time for her yet. (I bought all her books though, I’ll let you know how they are). Just like I had told myself a better story in the car while in traffic… I am telling myself a better story about this meeting. I am grateful for the opportunity, the inspiration, and I am CHOOSING to see it in a better light. This switch in perception alone gives me that much more juice to keep the momentum going. That’s the crazy part, the positive feeds us ten times more yet some reason we still jump to the negative because it’s what we are used to even though it doesn’t make us feel good.

The Daily Love has absolutely changed my life and I will never be the same because of it. My brain has transformed in the most inspirational way. Recently everything has been making more sense, after 4 years of learning what I have learned, I KNOW that I am doing nothing but growing and working towards my purpose and that gives me HUGE fulfillment. I want to put myself out here, be vulnerable, express my fears and share my trials and in turn inspire others the way in which I have been inspired.

I have seen TDL grow from JUST a Twitter site, to a website, to only Mastin posting a couple of times a week, to every day, to a couple of people a week guest blogging, to what it is today. From him not having a relationship in 7 years to being in a beautiful relationship with a beautiful girl. From being a guy that was sleeping on couches to a guy that has met and even inspired Oprah. I have witnessed his life transform before me as a result of the truth he speaks and can’t help but want to test the formula on my life.

After meeting Mastin, My boyfriend asked “so are you satisfied”. I looked at him and said “NO!” and I went in to all the reason I just screwed up that chance. I felt like I didn’t show confidence, I probably sounded lame, I didn’t catch his attention. All these negative stories about myself. Although I still felt very much inspired, I couldn’t help but think about how I just might not be good enough to do what he does and get where he’s at. Today I was telling my friend the story and she said “All your visions are coming true”. I suddenly thought “Yea, you’re right!”.

 Yes I can think of all the ways “I messed up” when it comes to this seminar or I can step back  and, like my friend said, “I’m getting closer to my dreams”. It doesn’t matter how I thought I appeared but the fact that we met and spoke is a step. When you believe in your dreams, they can’t help but come true!!!

I wasn’t lying Mastin, I’ll see you again sometime!

xoxo,

By Taking Chances, We Learn To Be Brave

A Creed To Live By

Don’t undermine your worth by comparing
yourself with others.
It is because we are different that each of us is special.
Don’t set your goals by what other people
deem important.

Only you know what is best for you.
Don’t take for granted the things closest to your heart.
Cling to them as you would your life, for without them
life is meaningless.

Don’t let your life slip through your fingers
by living in the past or for the future.
By living your life one day at a time,
you live all the days of your life.

Don’t give up when you still have something to give.
Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.
Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect.
It is this fragile thread that binds us to each other.
Don’t be afraid to encounter risks.

It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.
Don’t shut love out of your life by saying it’s impossible to find.
The quickest way to receive love is to give love.
The fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly;
and the best way to keep love is to give it wings.
Don’t dismiss your dreams.

To be without dreams is to be without hope;
to be without hope is to be without purpose.
Don’t run through life so fast that you forget
not only where you’ve been, but also where you’re going.
Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored
each step of the way.

 ~ Nancye Sims ~

Mini Goal Monday: One Step Closer

Here it is…Monday again!!! OH NO! haha. Monday has this sort of negative association attached to it. Why? Wellll because it’s the first day of the week for most people when they have to go back to work. Most people dread work sooooo much that they dread Mondays. That doesn’t sound fun.

 Monday sets the tone for the rest of your work week. So then guess what? You spend the week looking forward to Friday and instead of living in the moment you live in the future and the moment passes you by. That’s 5 out of 7 days that you spend dreading your life or letting it pass you by. Then every year we say…this year went by so fast. Well no wonder, you spent majority of it not only dreading it but missing it because you were waiting for the weekend.

If you want your Mondays to be better (thus setting a better tone for the rest of your week) I see two options to get past this oh-so-dread. You change your perception of Mondays and start thinking of ways to enjoy Monday…..or….. you get a new job!

 

There is NO reason to have a job you don’t enjoy. There is NO reason to compromise your happiness. Most of us work jobs we don’t like because of money and in turn we think money  is going to make us happy… but guess what, if you’re not happy working then what’s the point? That’s 70% of your life unhappy and to me, money is not worth it, especially when most come to find out money doesn’t really make them happy in the end. It’s what you do with your life that can make you happy. How you use 100% of your time not the remaining 30%.

Now I understand that for most of us, our dream job doesn’t just land in our lap. We have to do some other work to survive to then get to where we eventually want to be BUT don’t compromise too much of your self or your happiness to do so. Make sure you keep your dreams in view. Make sure you are working and doing what you need to get closer to where you want to be. Evaluate what you are currently doing and ask yourself a few questions. Is this on track to getting me to where I want to be? Am I growing? Am I gaining experience? Am I learning? If money weren’t a factor, would I still want to do this? What am I compromising and is it worth it?

That’s why Mini-Goal Mondays exist. So we can get used to becoming clear with our goals, not matter how big or small, and breaking them down so everyday counts, and everyday we are doing something that will get us to our goals. THIS is what can help you change your perspective if right now you can’t change your job.

Monday counts just as much as every other day. What tone do you want to set for your week? How can you make today count?

xoxo,

Mini Goal Monday: Are You Ready?

HAPPY MONDAY!!!

So today is a good Monday for me. You know why? I lost 6lbs this last week. I worked hard to do it too so I am very excited. It seems like a lot but I packed on a good amount of weight the previous weekend from going crazy on the junk food so I think it was a little easier to lose so much. We are down to the wire though so I have worked EXTRA hard to meet my goals. I hate very healthy last week, yes i had a few cheats of candy but it was VERY minimal, I did the workout videos in the mornings, and I went to the gym 4 times and did a lot of cardio. And guess what, it allll paid off very nicely and was the motivation I needed to keep going this week.

Something funny I did last week that FORCED me into the gym was a checked-in to the gym on my Facebook and I wrote “I give permission for anyone to slap me if you do not see me check in to the gym 4 times this week” and I can promise you, THIS is the main reason I made sure I was at the gym 4 times. When I wrote that I had the days I was gonna go planned out but forgot I was going out of town. Well I had to make sure when I was out of town to get to the gym for check in #4. I really did feel accountable and worried that someone would have come up and slapped me 🙂

Last weeks Mini Goal Monday was about the difference between people who believe their goals will happen and people who have doubt their goals can happen. I later read an article that was amazing about it needing to be the right time to kick habits. If it’s not the right time, you won’t kick it and not only that you will continue to down yourself for not doing so. The article was called “Don’t Kick the Habit”  written by Lissa Rankin and it was featured on my ultimate favorite website The Daily Love. If you are a fan of my Facebook page you may have already read this, if not I suggest you do now.

Here is what she writes:

Don’t try to stop smoking. Don’t give up booze. Don’t throw out your pot. Don’t ditch the donuts.

While you’re at it, don’t join the gym.  Don’t try to meditate every day.  Don’t promise to get over your money issues. Don’t resolve to lose twenty pounds.

Don’t quit the job you hate. Don’t leave your deadbeat boyfriend.  Don’t try to be a better mother/ daughter/ friend. Don’t give up internet porn.

Don’t finish that novel. Don’t sign up for that art class. Don’t declutter your house. Don’t get out of debt.

When you make promises to yourself before you’re ready to make big change, you just prove to yourself what you’ve suspected all along – that you don’t have the willpower, you’re not trustworthy and you never follow through on your word.

You pay big bucks to Jenny Craig, but you never follow the program. You sign up for the art class, but you don’t start painting. You look at your computer, but you don’t write your novel. You look up 12 step programs but then you never go. You sign up for that green juice cleanse and then you never cleanse. You pay the $99 every month, but you don’t actually go to the gym. You make a budget but then you don’t follow it. You break up with your boyfriend and two days later, you sleep with him. You try to quit your job until they offer you a raise and you get sucked in again.

Every time you make a promise to yourself that you don’t keep, you feel like shit. And when you feel like shit, what do you do? You smoke that cigarette/ eat that ice cream/ start jonesing for that drug or that sex or your couch potato lifestyle. When you make promises to yourself that you don’t keep, you make the habit worse.

Instead, wait until you’ve decided it’s really time.

Draw the line in the sand.

Refuse to accept anything less than 100% recovery.

Know that this time, it’s for real. And mean it.

Trust that once you decide you’re really ready, it will be easy. You’ll break the habit in a blink. You’ll never look back.

But until you’re 1000% on board with your decision, don’t kick the habit. Give yourself permission to buy that pack of cigarettes or that bottle of wine or that blunt. Love yourself as you smoke or drink or get high. Love yourself as you lounge on the sofa and binge on potato chips. Love yourself as you overspend, overindulge, oversex, overgive, overprocrastinate. Cancel the gym membership. Drop out of the art class. Close your computer.  Get off the scale. Inhale all the way.

And love yourself just as you are, for every little flaw that makes you who you are, for better or for worse.

When you do, something magical will happen. At some point, when you least expect it, in the midst of this love-fest, a spark will catch fire. The flame will grow. The light will outshine the darkness. The darkness will no longer be able to resist the light.

When you love yourself so much, in spite of your imperfections, you will hit a point on some future day, and it will come when you least expect it. It won’t be a resolution or a promise or anything they make you do in rehab. It will come from within, and it will be easy – and it will be permanent.

One day, you will love yourself so much that you will decide you’re done with the habit, you’re ready to accomplish the goal, and the time is now.

It will happen effortlessly, and you will never look back.

If that time isn’t here yet, you will never succeed in quitting, no matter how much you try to convince yourself you want to quit. Your failure will be guaranteed, and then you will prove to yourself – once again – what a loser you are.

But you’re not a loser, my love. You just haven’t decided yet. And that’s okay. I forgive you, so please forgive yourself.

Until you decide the time is now, you might as well give yourself permission to enjoy that cigarette, to breathe it in, to breathe it out, and to throw your arms out as you do…

Is now the time?

Loving you just the way you are

I think this article is awesome is makes VERY good points. Everyone has their own time and the perfect time can only be figured out by them. If there is something in your life that you want to change, only you have the power to make it happen and if you are not ready, you will not change. So the power then lies in understanding yourself and knowing yourself enough to know when you are ready. In many people’s lives will come the turning point of when you face “Do I want to continue my life this way?” or “I want my life to be better, I deserve better”. For some people it can be when they are 14 years old for others it can be at 60 years old. Sadly for some it may never happen. This is your changing point and when you hit it, you will know it and you will go full force. So the question now becomes “ARE YOU READY?”

 

Mini Goals:
*Continue with my workout/eating regimen
*Do some itinerary planning for my trip to  New York next week
*Finish editing pictures from my mini sessions for clients to see by Sunday
*HAVE A GOOD WEEK!!! 

xoxo,

Mini-Goal Monday: Mindset

Here we are again at Monday. How did everyone’s goals go? I can tell you how mine went didn’t go. They did not go as planned at all…again! I started thinking about what is holding me back and it started becoming clear that it was my mindset. I can’t sit here and lie and say that my mindset is 100% focus on that I can complete my weight loss challenge. I mean I can count many times in the past in which I have said “This summer is going to be the summer”. I’m pretty sure it’s at least been the last 4… ever since I had my son. Then every summer passes me by and yet again I don’t meet my goals. I started thinking, maybe I’m just not THAT person that is meant to lose weight. Maybe only certain people have that motivation it takes to go to the gym all the time, eat healthy, stay fit. I am not one of those.

Could you see how having those thoughts in the back of my head could prevent me from ever reaching my goal. My mindset is that I am not worthy of the results that I want. If your beliefs determine your behavior then it is NO FAIL that I won’t meet me goals.

Last January I started a weight loss contest in which if I made it, I would have gotten $5,000. I didn’t have to “WIN” the contest I just had to lose 30lbs. I had even spent two weeks gaining 8lbs, which was oh-so-very FUN, just so I could have 30lbs to lose in the first place. I thought that money was a VERY good motivator in finally being able to reach the goal. The end date was Memorial Weekend which was perfect because it’s the kick-off to summer. So it’s not a coincidence that’s the same goal this year.

I started off great, lost 6lbs the first week. Of course probably part of the weight I had gained for fun but it still made me very excited. In the back of my head I was thinking though “This is just the extra weight, I’ll believe it when I get under 140lbs”, because this seemed to have been my stable weight since I had stopped playing sports. We had to send in a picture every sunday along with our current weight. At ANY time during the contest we could be asked for photo proof of our weight (picture of us standing on scale) and at ANY time we could be kicked out for not consistently losing weight. Yet another good motivator. Every week I was losing an average of 1.5lbs a week. One day I got to 137 and I couldn’t believe it. Literally. Then sirens were really starting to sound “Ok I’m probably not going to get less than this” . Since I had not been less than 140lbs for years, this belief was ruling my head. Discounting how hard I actually worked to lose the 18lbs I had just lost.  Guess what? After I reached 137lbs, I didn’t lose a single pound after that. I was going to the gym at 5 times a week and went down to 3 times. I had stopped counting my calories on my phone app. Basically whatever was working for me before, I had stopped. For three weeks I was the same weight. And then…. I got kicked out of the contest. After that it was over and I hadn’t lost weight since. I had actually went back up to the magical 140lbs and for the  most part I had stayed the same for a long time, which was REALLY good that I didn’t gain all 18lbs back but still again I was unable to reach my goal and discouraged for the rest of the summer year.

When you think back to any times where you goals were unmet, can you remember what your mindset was? Do you remember having doubt that you could fulfill it? Could you see how that doubt, even if FAR back in your brain, could determine your behavior?

All those people who are reaching their goals aren’t supernatural. The only difference between them and you is that they believe they can make it to the end. Their brains work in positive mode not doubtful or negative mode. This weekend someone told me, “Good things happen to good people” and although I agree with this, I believe good things happen to those that believe they will. There are plenty of good people who don’t have good things happen, and there are plenty of not-so-good people whom have good things happen to them. Now how long these good things last, we will leave up to Karma! This is the secret though people. You can create WHATEVER life you want if you have the correct mindset. The people who are reaching their goals and getting where they want in life believe this.

The real goal is to KNOW that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to. My challenge to you is to pick one of the hardest things it has been for you to complete, mine is reaching my goal weight, and BELIEVE that you will get there. Commit to making it to the end, even if you have to extend it a bit, and GET THERE. I promise, if you can complete your hardest goal, your life will FOREVER change. Your motivation towards life and all things you want will increase because you will know that you can get it. There aren’t people out there that are more or less deserving then you, we ALL deserve the things we want in life. There is enough abundance in this world to make everyone happy. It is all in your mindset. If you KNOW you can have it, it’s simple….YOU WILL!!! When you catch yourself thinking or saying “It’s not going to happen”, STOP YOURSELF and say “YES IT WILL”

So what is your hardest goal to complete??

 

xoxo,