By Taking Chances, We Learn To Be Brave

A Creed To Live By

Don’t undermine your worth by comparing
yourself with others.
It is because we are different that each of us is special.
Don’t set your goals by what other people
deem important.

Only you know what is best for you.
Don’t take for granted the things closest to your heart.
Cling to them as you would your life, for without them
life is meaningless.

Don’t let your life slip through your fingers
by living in the past or for the future.
By living your life one day at a time,
you live all the days of your life.

Don’t give up when you still have something to give.
Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.
Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect.
It is this fragile thread that binds us to each other.
Don’t be afraid to encounter risks.

It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.
Don’t shut love out of your life by saying it’s impossible to find.
The quickest way to receive love is to give love.
The fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly;
and the best way to keep love is to give it wings.
Don’t dismiss your dreams.

To be without dreams is to be without hope;
to be without hope is to be without purpose.
Don’t run through life so fast that you forget
not only where you’ve been, but also where you’re going.
Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored
each step of the way.

 ~ Nancye Sims ~

What’s Your “Thing”?

So I was browsing some posts from the blogs I follow, I havent really been able to do so much. I came across “Save Your Own Ass” by Truth and Cake. It is about finding that thing that is yours. For most bloggers it writing. All my life I feel like I was always trying to find that one thing that I am good at AND love to do. Most of us do this when we are younger and some are still searching now. I’ve thought I had many things over the years. Soccer and track. I used to think those were my thing until I got hurt and never played the same. Drawing used to be my thing until I had to go to a “real” college and take “real” classes. Photography became my thing when people started asking me to take pictures of them and wanted to pay me. I mean I have a small business in it now that’s how “my thing” it is.  I love soccer (and still miss it greatly), I love track, I love drawing, I love photography…I love a lot of things but recently I have realized those things aren’t my THING.  I have discovered in the recent years that the thing I love to do and can’t seem to go without is growing and helping people. Not just helping people as in philanthropy, but helping people become better people.

I just have this natural inclination as I think we most do towards love. Having love, being love, watching love, spreading love. I always had little signs that were pointing me in this direction but never really paid attention to the commonality of it all. It was just in the few years that I  formally to pathways to self growth, law of attraction, power of intention, positive thinking type stuff. I became so intrigued because I got it instantly. I felt like my mind just automatically understood things on a very deep level and it all resonated with me instantly. I always wanted to share what I learned with other people. I watched The Secret probably 8 times in the span of a few months just because I always wanted to show other people and watch it with them every time. Every time I read a good psychology self-help book I will rave about it over and over. I am constantly talking to my friends and trying to give advice and pushing them towards their dreams.. I even find people I barely know and if I see they are feeling negative I try to add in a positive note. I mean I sometimes feel like I’m Angel’s Advocate (instead of Devils) because I feel like no matter what I am always trying to help others see the “bright” side of things.

Am I saying I’m perfect? NOT AT ALL. This is even more reason of why I feel so passionately about it. Self growth never stops. It’s never perfect. I always say ” if you stop growing you stop living”. We can always be better people and learn new things because we will always have new experiences. Every time I have a conversation with someone, find a new article, read a new book, share a few quotes… I am learning and growing too, I am becoming more aware of how to live my own advice. I never claim to be perfect. I never claim my words are the TRUTH. I just like to share what I am passionate about, what I have found to be true in my life, what I have experienced or witnessed in others, and I just dare you to see it as possibility. Is it possible? not “buts” about it. If it’s possible then what would that look like for you? If you don’t see it possible then why?  I crave learning just as much as I do sharing. I just love to expand my horizons and help others expand theirs.

About a year ago I found this really good blog and I started sharing quotes from the articles. I had found so much meaning and relation to the articles that I felt like if it had helped me so much and made me think twice about something in a positive way then maybe it can do that for others. You never know who its reaching and how much it could touch their lives at that moment as we ALL have our shit. Well randomly I would get these emails from people I didn’t even realize paid two cents of my attention thanking me for my posts because it had helped them. I felt this connection and love. It made me even more committed to sharing.

I have many plans and ideas as to how to work this thing of mine and the blog is just one. I can admit I am not the best writer. I have read many of blog that have made me want to quit because I felt I didn’t compare but for some reason I have not quit. I mean sometimes it’s very hard for me to write. It can be near impossible to articulate all the things going on in my head. I definitely speak better than I write in certain subjects. I have not quit though because I have come to see that writing may not be my thing but, although scary, my fears have not allowed me to stop because by doing it I am doing mything. This is the thing that gives me joy and enthusiasm. This is the thing that keeps me alive. When I go through tough time, the things that save me are positive influence. This is what saves my ass. Growing and Helping. By all means I am not a pro but I have a passion. Ask my friends, when I speak to them I speak with conviction. A passion so deep to truly just want the best for myself and others and learning and sharing how to get that. To get them to experience the miracles of ourselves and the experiences we have. Friend, family, or foe. By sharing my experiences, articles, quotes, and what I come to see as true, maybe just maybe it’s reaching out to some unknown person and helping change their life.

What is your thing?Maybe by finding and doing your thing you can have an impact on someone’s life too, even better, your own…. Sometime’s we don’t know until we do it. Let’s admit, at least us in the blogging world, writers and readers, love growing and helping.

Leaving you with a Paulo Coelho quote that was already posted the other day:

“Whenever we do something that fills us with enthusiasm, we are following our legend. However, we don’t all have the courage to confront our own dream”

Think about it!

xoxo,

Feeling Stuck?

Ok so some of you (or none of you) may have noticed that I havent been posting much in the last few weeks. Its weird bc when I started I was trying to post about 4-5 times a week even if it were just a picture or an article and it started dwindling down. It was sort of sub consciously. I was making excuses like “I’m too busy” “I don’t really have time” “I’ll post tomorrow“.  And all of a sudden I went a whole week without posting.  I kept thinking of ideas/topics of what to talk about but would talk myself out of writing because “do I really know what I am talking about?”

So I was talking to my boyfriend about how I need to write in my blog and we were going over some reasons that I havent written and of course I am totally putting myself down about it. Comparing myself to some of my favorite bloggers, wondering if I even have enough knowledge or experience on “The Path” to share with other people with any conviction, etc.  Then I magically started talking about how Mastin from The Daily Love talks about how with all the technology and social media in our lives now, we are so connected and we are used to getting all our wants and answers at the snap of a finger. We have cell phones, we can call people the second we think about it. If someone is far away, in another country, we can Skype or email and have a conversation instantly (for free). When we want to listen to the new hot song we just heard on the radio we can download on our phones and computers. When we have a question about anything, we Google it and find 100 responses.

We have come to think that we have LIFE at our fingertips. We have been so spoiled to say the least, that when it does come to something that naturally takes TIME, we become little divas if we don’t get the results NOW.  It’s got us sped up in our own reality and we have lost the sense to  realize that some things take time and effort before getting the result and/or answer you want. It’s actually been disempowering to some of us to move forward in our lives.  We can work out and if we don’t see results the next day we give up. We can be in school but if we aren’t working our dream job at the same time we are discouraged. We can start our own business but if we aren’t rich in the first month we want to give up. Then we label this moment in our lives as STUCK. Listen, I can tell you where we are stuck!!! We are stuck in this life of reality TV and propaganda filled media. Everyone has money and is rich and seem to have best life that we are constantly comparing our lives to theirs and how come our life doesn’t seem to flow as perfectly. How come they seem to get everything done. I mean the divorce rate is so high because not only are people rushing into marriage with a person they hardly know due to this timeline of how their life should be, but they are also forgetting that they actually have to put effort into the relationship to get the results that they want. It’s not working out NOW so they give up.

It is time to slow down and realize that the things that are really worth it in life take time and take effort. We can’t discourage ourselves anymore when it comes to the things we want in life.

When I first wanted to start my blog it was supposed to be with the intentions of wanting to share MY story of MY experiences of MY life on The Path. But then I was trying to jumpstart into this fabulous blog with 1 million viewers overnight. Worried about my content, worried about if I needed to add more pages, worried about if I am saying the right thing. I was forgetting that my blog could take me  a few years before it’s at the point I eventually envision it to be. I never claimed to be some perfect creatively written author. I just wanted some sort  of relatable outlet of the what I have felt and am experiencing as a result to reading other amazing articles. I have to realize that over time I will get better and be more experienced on topics and when I am ready I will then have the expertise to build my readers and content. I’m so worried to catch a reader’s eye right away (and if I don’t im doomed) that I am focusing less on my original intentions for my blog in the first place. By expecting my end results now I have discouraged myself from putting in the effort I actually need to get off the ground in the first place. I am worry about all these issues but how much effort have I even put in to achieve such results? not enough. I’m so worried about trying to be perfect that I’ve stopped myself from even being able to move forward. The funny thing is thing is how this same theme has played out in other areas in my life as well. Isn’t it ironic that we build up our anxiety of not having results NOW and the fear that we won’t get there because it’s not NOW, that we hinder ourselves completely. When you aren’t moving forward you either moving backwards or standing still and we don’t want to do either of those.

How much more satisfying is it when you actually get something you want and you know that you worked hard to get it. When things come so easily we tend to take advantage of it and it loses value. Nothing is worth it in the end if it loses its value. When we work hard for something it will never lose value. The effort, and determination we put in to something, plus the things we gain from that can never be taken away and that is what gives it value in the first place. Sure we might be “broke” for a period of time, you might have to wake up early or go to bed late, you might have to sacrifice some things… but with hard work, determination, and of course love, you will get to your destination. It is absolutely impossible not to. Continue to move forward and you will get there wherever there may be. Your perfect love, your perfect career, your perfect life, your perfect blog. These ideas can be applied to all areas of life.

Stop labeling your life as STUCK! Stop discouraging yourself out of your dreams! Stop standing still! I may have mentioned this before but Nike’s slogan couldnt be better: JUST DO IT!

The universe is constantly giving us opportunities to fulfill our desires but it’s still up to us to put the needed effort in to what it is. If only we used as much energy as we do talking ourselves down into talking ourselves UP! I have this opportunity to eventually make my blog into something wonderful so I have to quit feeling discouraged and becoming a prisoner to my fears. I see Oprah, Tony Robbins, Mastin Kipp, guest blogging, motivational speaking, Life Coaching in my future but how do I expect to get there if I am choosing to be stuck? I need to just continue to move forward, put the needed effort in to it, and then just watch it and myselfgrow. Not only that but ENJOY THE JOURNEY. It is during the journey where all the learning and growing happens anyways right? The ability to enjoy the journey is the precursor to how the destination will feel. If you can’t enjoy now then what can you enjoy?

Yes our current technology is great. Being connected and having things at our fingertips can be awesome, and it’s only gonna get more advanced as time moves forward, but you can not afford to forget that although some things will come at the blink of an eye, not everything will and is supposed to. Focus on enjoying the effort and the journey. And even better, move forward without hindering yourself with tons of expectations. Have no expectations. JUST DO IT!!!

My challenge to you is to start thinking about: What opportunities have you been given right now? Are you putting in the correct amount of effort into it to achieve the results that you wish? If not how can you start to do that? We are all destined for greatness. now go get what you deserve!!!

xoxo,

If you wanna be HAPPY you have to GIVE UP.

I know, I know…I’ve been laggin on the post lately. I promise I will get to something juicy soon. But for now I was reading a post from Purpose Fairy and I thought it was pretty convienant given conversations I’ve had with friends over the last few days. The post was called “15 Things You Should Give Up to Be Happy”.

Happiness is the purpose of life. If you aren’t happy, you aren’t doing it right. Humans are creatures of habit. We create certain habits for the purpose of many different things. The outcome can give us pleasure, can give someone else pleasure, protect us… Some of these habits developed wayyyyy when you were a little kid. Now do you think its logical that what was best at the time for a 2 year old is best for a 30 year old? Even a 14 year old and a 30 year old? Most likely not. When things have been habit for so long though, years upon years,  it can hard to recognize what just isn’t doing you any service anymore. It is time to free yourself.

Well in the article I read they list 15 things that one has to give up if they want to start being happy. Pure and LASTING happiness always starts from inside. Here are the ideas:

1. Give up your need to always be right

 There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?” Wayne Dyer. What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?

2. Give up your need for control

Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.

“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” Lao Tzu

3. Give up on blame

 Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk

 Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.

“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” Eckhart Tolle

5. Give up your limiting beliefs

about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!

“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” Elly Roselle

6. Give up complaining

 Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.

7. Give up the luxury of criticism

Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.

8. Give up your need to impress others

Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.

9. Give up your resistance to change

 Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.
“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls” 
Joseph Campbell

10. Give up labels

 Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open. “The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” Wayne Dyer

11. Give up on your fears

Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.
“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.”
 Franklin D. Roosevelt

12. Give up your excuses

Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.

13. Give up the past

I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

14. Give up attachment

This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another,  attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond words.

15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations

Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about themselves.  You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.

Which of these steps are you guilty of? How is it working out for you? How much happiness has it ended up costing you? There comes a time when you have to weigh your options and realize your happiness is important, and in the end, what we all strive for. If you aren’t happy NOW in the present, when are you going to be happy? The present is ALLLL you’ve got. So do what makes you happy NOW and I promise it will lead to actions that will cause you to be happy in the future. If that leads you to somewhere off the path of what you’re plans were, let it, at least you know it’ll lead you to somewhere you want to be.

My challenge is to be mindful in the steps above and how you contribute to them…where they take you…and try to let them go and just EXPERIENCE the difference and how it works out for you. 🙂 When you can be happy inside, you can them start to fully accept happiness from others and better yet, spread happiness to others. Your happiness is in the palm of YOUR hand.

xoxo,

Mini-Goal Monday: Mindset

Here we are again at Monday. How did everyone’s goals go? I can tell you how mine went didn’t go. They did not go as planned at all…again! I started thinking about what is holding me back and it started becoming clear that it was my mindset. I can’t sit here and lie and say that my mindset is 100% focus on that I can complete my weight loss challenge. I mean I can count many times in the past in which I have said “This summer is going to be the summer”. I’m pretty sure it’s at least been the last 4… ever since I had my son. Then every summer passes me by and yet again I don’t meet my goals. I started thinking, maybe I’m just not THAT person that is meant to lose weight. Maybe only certain people have that motivation it takes to go to the gym all the time, eat healthy, stay fit. I am not one of those.

Could you see how having those thoughts in the back of my head could prevent me from ever reaching my goal. My mindset is that I am not worthy of the results that I want. If your beliefs determine your behavior then it is NO FAIL that I won’t meet me goals.

Last January I started a weight loss contest in which if I made it, I would have gotten $5,000. I didn’t have to “WIN” the contest I just had to lose 30lbs. I had even spent two weeks gaining 8lbs, which was oh-so-very FUN, just so I could have 30lbs to lose in the first place. I thought that money was a VERY good motivator in finally being able to reach the goal. The end date was Memorial Weekend which was perfect because it’s the kick-off to summer. So it’s not a coincidence that’s the same goal this year.

I started off great, lost 6lbs the first week. Of course probably part of the weight I had gained for fun but it still made me very excited. In the back of my head I was thinking though “This is just the extra weight, I’ll believe it when I get under 140lbs”, because this seemed to have been my stable weight since I had stopped playing sports. We had to send in a picture every sunday along with our current weight. At ANY time during the contest we could be asked for photo proof of our weight (picture of us standing on scale) and at ANY time we could be kicked out for not consistently losing weight. Yet another good motivator. Every week I was losing an average of 1.5lbs a week. One day I got to 137 and I couldn’t believe it. Literally. Then sirens were really starting to sound “Ok I’m probably not going to get less than this” . Since I had not been less than 140lbs for years, this belief was ruling my head. Discounting how hard I actually worked to lose the 18lbs I had just lost.  Guess what? After I reached 137lbs, I didn’t lose a single pound after that. I was going to the gym at 5 times a week and went down to 3 times. I had stopped counting my calories on my phone app. Basically whatever was working for me before, I had stopped. For three weeks I was the same weight. And then…. I got kicked out of the contest. After that it was over and I hadn’t lost weight since. I had actually went back up to the magical 140lbs and for the  most part I had stayed the same for a long time, which was REALLY good that I didn’t gain all 18lbs back but still again I was unable to reach my goal and discouraged for the rest of the summer year.

When you think back to any times where you goals were unmet, can you remember what your mindset was? Do you remember having doubt that you could fulfill it? Could you see how that doubt, even if FAR back in your brain, could determine your behavior?

All those people who are reaching their goals aren’t supernatural. The only difference between them and you is that they believe they can make it to the end. Their brains work in positive mode not doubtful or negative mode. This weekend someone told me, “Good things happen to good people” and although I agree with this, I believe good things happen to those that believe they will. There are plenty of good people who don’t have good things happen, and there are plenty of not-so-good people whom have good things happen to them. Now how long these good things last, we will leave up to Karma! This is the secret though people. You can create WHATEVER life you want if you have the correct mindset. The people who are reaching their goals and getting where they want in life believe this.

The real goal is to KNOW that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to. My challenge to you is to pick one of the hardest things it has been for you to complete, mine is reaching my goal weight, and BELIEVE that you will get there. Commit to making it to the end, even if you have to extend it a bit, and GET THERE. I promise, if you can complete your hardest goal, your life will FOREVER change. Your motivation towards life and all things you want will increase because you will know that you can get it. There aren’t people out there that are more or less deserving then you, we ALL deserve the things we want in life. There is enough abundance in this world to make everyone happy. It is all in your mindset. If you KNOW you can have it, it’s simple….YOU WILL!!! When you catch yourself thinking or saying “It’s not going to happen”, STOP YOURSELF and say “YES IT WILL”

So what is your hardest goal to complete??

 

xoxo,

Mini Goal Monday: the SMART way

So last week , on top of my usual weight loss goals, I made quite a few goals to be held by today. I also had a lot going on last week and I also didn’t think clearly about them and how they were going to be achieved. This may not have been a smart way to make my goal planning. Key word “planning”. Goals should always be planned, even if they are mini in order to achieve them.

Here are some keys to making SMART goals:

The key one that I didn’t pay attention to last week was ATTAINABLE. I knew, even as I was writing them that weren’t ALL attainble considering my schedule. Knowing that ahead of time I was just setting myself up for failure. So as you get ready to set your Mini Goals this week do it the SMART way.

“This one step – choosing a goal and sticking to it – changes everything.” Scott Reed

So what are you goals this week?

Mini Goals
I have 4 more weeks to fit my fitness goals with 7 more lbs to lose. so this is about 1.75lbs a week. any slacking off from now could knock me off my MAIN goal so I gotta stay on top of it. Back to my weight loss goals for now because those are important to me.

*Workout video every morning this week at 7am M-F
*Gym monday 8pm, wed 8pm, fri 3:30pm, sunday hiking 9am
*No candy or junk food
*No eating after 8pm except protein shakes (with water) after gym.
*lose 2lbs this week

xoxo,